Masks

Many people go around wearing masks, myself included. They aren't all bad. Now I don't mean physical masks, though one of mine is a physical one. (I feel like I start off every post with a clarification) I mean life masks. Masks that conceal the inner feelings. I wear a mask of Happiness. I'm generally a happy person and one of my life quotes is, "If you aren't laughing you aren't living." 

Seriously, laughing everyday should be very high on your priority list. Especially that side-splitting, 'I don't know where I am anymore,' uncontrollable laughter. Its linked to being healthier... but I digress... as usual.

I put a good bit of effort into making sure I'm nearly always happy on the outside. I feed on the happiness of others. It makes me happy to see others happy or to help make them happier, regardless of how I feel on the inside. For the last 7 seven years life has just been going downhill for me and thus the mask has been on more often than not. 

Ever ask me how I am doing and I say 'I'm hangin' in there?' Yeah.. probably not a good day, though generally if you catch it and ask I typically will tell you. I'm not exactly a closed book.

Hangin' in there like a vine...

So I've been wearing this mask... and one other (ever wonder why I always have sunglasses? I don't like my eyes) for what over a decade and a recent situation plus an awesome book I'm reading both said this is bad. I'm sure they were both talking about being fake. Now I agree its bad to be fake, but I am a fan of 'fake it 'til you make it.' There is quite a difference.  

One you are trying to be something you aren't, the other you are trying to be something you are... respectively. 

At this point I'm living life hour by hour as a day is just too far ahead. At that point I seem to constantly be stepping on rugs that are always being pulled out, but life is about risks and getting back in the saddle, no? As I type this I can feel a headache slowly growing in my head and that is one risk I'm not taking.. so this is going to be shorter than expected..

(What no random moral of the story?) I don't really know what to say here. Don't be fake, but if life has you down fake it 'til you make it? That doesn't quite roll off the tongue as I would like, but it'll have to do for now.